Comfort zone

Have heard of comfort zone? Have heard of cocoon and how d butterfly  struggling to come out of it and eventually flying freely?

Life now is good,  steady income, comfort and comfort..

One more year, she is going to be in primary one. What does it means to me?

Dear, i really dont want you to be taken care by others after school. I want to be with you, shaping your character, pursuing your life challenge with you. You know how comfortable mummy now, if you go to your caretaker and mummy bring you back after work. Save the fuss, the shouts,and sanity.

But mummy knows is not like that. Soon, and very soon you will grow, and our time together is short. I want to cherish all my moments with you. This may cost mummy some price.

Mummy be strong, knowing that 20years later, you will not regret for your decision.

Hello, my 1 year old

Dear baby boy,

You are officially one year old. Mummy is dread when think back 1 year ago, a night before you are born..the pain come hourly,shorten by half hourly,15 minutes ,3 minutes, and 1min apart for the whole night babe. You are born the next day at 8.54am with 3-4 pushes.pheww..

You make me the worst mother in the world when you are admitted to hospital at 3 months old for 10 days. Those 10 days are like hell for mummy. It is so heart breaking to see you endure the needles and sucking the gas..doctor diagnose you as pneumonia with bronchiolitis.

A visit to the doctor becomes our routine until you are 6-7 months. I can really recall..babe, that is mummy forever nightmare.

In between,mummy also need to wrestling with my own emotion and uncertainty, self-doubt,blaming and pressure to give up my job. Not mummy reluctant to give up the job babe, mummy needs to think further and just cant throw all the responsibilty to provide for family away. It is a pressure and be glad mummy have gone through.

Happy Birthday,my boy. Sister,mummy and daddy love you forever.